"It's nice to see you as a young adult, kid, what with all the chemicals in the pool water." - Coach Sasabe, episode 8
Coach Sasabe currently runs an "exotic bird emporium" and an ostrich farm. He mentions the police trying to take the ostriches and having some illegal birds. Other known animals are carrier pigeons, emu and prawns, which he uses to create "weird porn."
“You know a coach! That’s literally his first name!” - Gou, episode 16He's a conspiracy nut who believes that his ex-wife is part of the Illuminati and that the president monitors everyone's mailboxes. He also uses a decoder ring though there was a brief period where he was unable to decode things because an emu had swallowed it. He traded use of his boat for Rei's assistance in retrieving it. Much to his dismay, Rei doesn't actually help because Sasabe wasted his three hours by talking about a conspiracy theory.